Thy Must Cheat!!!!

I want you to imagine happiness.I'm not asking for the things that make you happy, materialistic or otherwise, I want you to imagine happiness in person. Give happiness a physical manifestation. What would happiness look like to you? In my mind, happiness is a woman. No,happiness is a babe. Happiness is 6"1, she has dark skin. She's a nice moderate C cup, a perfect 360 degree behind, the type only Anime cartoonists can sketch. Happiness has no ethnicity, no homeland, she's not tied down to any tribe or race. She is perfect to a fault. Everything I've ever dreamt about. Happiness has Tyra Bank's height, Kerry Washington's lips, Scarlett Johanssen's face, Eva Mendes's ass, Whitney Houston's voice, Helen Mirren's timelessness and Alicia Key's soul. She is the one I truly believe is for me.

Now, I know her, I want her, she should be mine. I should experience happiness in all her glory for the rest of my life... But the truth is I may never meet her. Rather, and this is the case of the majority of mankind, I will more likely end up with her sister, Acceptance. Acceptance is the older sister of happiness. She is the one that men settle for. She's not as fine, nowhere as elegant, and though all our lives, we crave the being that is her younger sister, we more often than not end up wit her. We do not know this at first. When we're young, we all believe happiness is our birthright. We were not brought to earth to be the companions of acceptance, why should we? After all, why settle for average? We swear on everything precious that we shall never succumb to acceptance.

Acceptance is not an option in the beginning, its happiness or othing. "She will be mine! I will love and cherish her and she will reciprocate this, letting me bask in all her splendour and magnificence!" But then we start to age, or as those who have gone before us term it, 'mature'. We start to see life for what it really is and we slowly begin to  realise that happiness is not meant for all of us. Yes, there are a select few who will tickle her fancy. Some of us will meet happiness head on and force her to bend to our will. She will submit to our advances and stay with us, sometimes temporarily, others as a life mate.

And there are some of us she will laugh off our proposals. She will haughtily turn her back on us and let us know that we're not in her league. At that time, when we think all is lost, acceptance shall embrace us. Yes, we can't have her sister, but she's still there for us. She cannot give us all the pleasures her younger sibling can grant us, but she will not leave us hanging high and dry.

Acceptance will not give me a mind blowing fellatio, only her sister will do that. Acceptance will refuse the threesome I propose, she does not indulge in that. She will let me bang though, but not how I want it. And who am I to complain, its her or nothing. People go through life with acceptance. She's not what they wanted, but what they got. The man with the extraordinary football skills who ended up as a banker, the girl with the magical voice who works as a secretary, the couple who married each other for convenience sakes, the talkative chap who would be perfect for radio, but works as a computer analyst, all these people were rejected by happiness and eloped with acceptance.

Acceptance will pay the bills. She will enable us have some semblance of a normal life. Acceptance will keep us safe, provide security and keep up necessary appearances. But she can never be her sister. She cannot be or give happiness. I'm writing this because today, after all my fighting and struggling, I fear happiness has failed to hear me. For some reason, she's just not that into me, doesn't care for my propositions. Thus, I have relented to the call of her sibling. I and acceptance have come to a mutual agreement. It hurts like fucking hell, but I think I've given in to acceptance. I am a man however. I must cheat, its genetically encoded into me. So,happiness, you bitch, we're not done yet. I may currently be nvolved with your sister, but don't for a second think that I've given up on you.

Happiness shall be my girl, whether the bitch is into me or not. To everyone one who has settled, given up on happiness and yielded to acceptance, I pray you all find more strength and forge on. Tell acceptance that this, this is NOT why we are here.

Goodnight. I, of course, remain  A FIGMENT OF YOUR IMAGINATION

Untitled 08/08/11

Head VS Heart or Heart VS Head????????????? i cant believe i am confused or rather undecided about a simple title to a blog, well you read it and decide.
Usually i am not a type of person to go all jelly weak in the kneel cos cupid shot a damn arrow (by the way tell that friggin dude i am gaan break his neck when i see him in person..............baby cherub or not). When it comes to matters like office romance i am a green finger leaf, not inexperience per say but i have always being undecided.....................you know GREY area kind of thing.
Funny how easy it is to judge or criticize others when you are not in their shoes, but when you get to experience it...........................Ha Ha it becomes a new kind of view (3D MAX).
Dont get me wrong, i am not against office romance neither am in support but now i dont know anymore, i am a victim!!!!!
I used to be a cool, calm and collected kind of guy, but it took one chance meeting and two lunch dates to change all that.................principle outta the window, heart in place of my head :( if you know what i mean. All the fibres in my body be screaming NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  i  swear my ears have formed an alliance with my heart................one word DEAF.
                      i always see her from afar wearing that look they all wear, i mean young executives trying to get to the top of their game......................confident, determined and a tad sassy,but all that changed after the first chat.
Like to describe her in detail but with all the confused emotion and mixed signals i feel right now, heaven knows that 'partial' is just a tip of the iceberg. Aside from being strikingly beautiful, her figure is all a monk needs to change his mind about celibacy...............the lushy lips, ample bossom, disarming smile and a walk to kill............... ern erm  Sa'id you can like to focus now if you gaan get this stuff done!! sorry about the distraction - but not really sorry per say, i just said it because my kind of job demands you apologise for no reason at all, you probably wondering what kind of shitty job is that? not to worry if you've ever called a customer care line then you know what i mean...............shit there i go again rambling and she aint even here. FOCUS !!!!!!! Ok ! Ok !! "Earth to Mars, do you copy"

              My case aint that of "boy meets girl, boy likes girl" kinda thing but it similar......................Hmmmm Lord save me !! (Mumu button activated).

             Cant tell when it all began but i sure know it changed after i spent the night at her  place................cancelled chicken order, substituted with chocolates.....one thing led to the other sha and i had to crash. For those of you with mind like gutter, sorry to burst your bubble but sleep was all we i we did. She was kind enough to let me sleep in one of her T-Shirt, that engulfing smell of her was the closest to paradise................how i so fantasized about those Jolie's kinda lips too bad i had to play the perfect gentleman guest.
        After hours of deep convo i felt i have found my soulmate...............Oya this is the part you pour a bucket of cold water on me, but not to worry even the hot one wont have any effect, this feeling has got to stop, schizophrenic disorder aint got nothing on what i feel, Banky W's strong thing has never felt so good.

   Come to think of it, it seem the feeling is MUTUAL (or am i seeing things) the stolen glances, the gentle touch , prolonged laughter etc.................well lets just hope she is laughing with me and not the other way round, http://www.jonzing.com/  right? but i swear there is definately a spark or why else would Work, Twitter, WhatsApp, SMS and calls be the order of the day? The time spent apart are still spent together virtually wirelessly, i have never appreciated my BB more.

     I ask myself ..........is it possible to feel this much for someone after 288 hours? i feel a new world record coming on and dont dare tell me its infatuation or something of the like, trust me i have a degree in every one of these side feelings: Obsession, Infatuation, Fling, Pity Sex you name it but i cant seem to tag this one.
             Being with her doing absolutely nothing is everything to me..............have i caught the BUG? when is this feeling going to stop, i am like a love sick puppy (did i just use the L-Word?) if i say i didnt like it then you know i lied..............Hmmmm issorai, issokay..............TO BE CONTINUED

There is Nothing Special About Me !!!

So here I am seated on the passenger’s side of the car taking my regular three hours trip from point A to point B, this has been an a an habit since I started my new job. Did I mention I had to fight in order to ride shot gun!!!!  (Ye Shall Not Judge). After hours of delay, watching vehicle after vehicle get stuffed with passengers…………..I refused but insisted I go with this particular car, so you understand the reason for protecting the seat with my life , ok maybe I lied.

          Into the journey armed with nothing but my earphones and spare battery, yes I am addicted to music like that…………I have heard this particular song playing like a gazillion times but funny enough I just listened to it today……and oh my was it inspiring or what, I could feel the lyrics squeezing my heart and pulling the strings of emotions. Bursting open the gates of some pent up stuff synonymous to the pursuit of happiness, under achievement, fear and uncertainty.  In a nut shell I found my missing fluctuating confidence. It’s a song by Kelis FT Cee Lo, LIL’Star ………………….yeah it’s that song.

          Trust me you got to hear listen again, I will attach a download link at the end of this blog but I will still go ahead and write my own version, that’s the version with revised lyrics of course….

“There is nothing special about me

I am just a little star

If it seems like I'm shining brightly

It's probably a reflection of something you already are

I forget about myself sometime When there's so many other around

When deep inside you feels darkest That is where I can always be found

Just keep trying and trying

It's just a matter of timing

Though the grinding is tiring

Don't let 'em stop you from smiling

Just keep trying and trying

Sooner or later you'll find it

It's surprising how inspiring

It is to see you shining

Cause in the dark of the night

 you're all i can see and

you sure look like a star to me

There is nothing special about me

I am just a lil star

If you try to reach out an touch me

you'll see I'm not really that far

I may not be the brightest nor am I the last one you’ll see

 But as long as you notice, that’s just fine with me

 Everything is just fine with me

There is nothing special about me

I am just a lil star

I’ve been running and jumping, but barely  getting over the bar I plan on being much more than I am but that's in due time

 But until then I'm guilty, and being human is my crime

 Being human that is my crime ……………….”

Now approaching my stop, until then I’ll prolly see you guys next week or the next time I take my regular trip.

PS: I’m too tired to bother about the customary GBAGAUN warning……………I am just a figment of your imagination

Download song here